Cubs 101

It is here and I’ll admit, I’m totally unprepared. After last season’s debacle I really closed them off in my mind, those underachieving bastards. Oh, and I also had a baby and we elected President Obama just weeks after, so it was kind of easy to forget. I’m not bitter about last year, just angry. I’m  not upset, just furious!

I exaggerate. I’m not worked up at all! I’m talking about the Cubs, of course, and apparently today is the day it starts all over again, another century of…futility perhaps? I have no clue who is starting, who made the team or what. Apparently board game maker Milton Bradley is a Cub now? I don’t know. I haven’t read what the Chicago papers are saying but I did just read this in the NY Times:

The Chicago Cubs are the clear favorites in the N.L. (and) no team has a pitching staff to match that of the Cubs.

Holy shit! Are you serious? Is the team that has gone 0-for the last two playoffs? Has something changed? Well, now I’m excited. Now I am back. This has all the makings of a serious situation!

No. I must remain skeptical. I must dial it back.I won’t get fooled again. No no no no no! Yeeeeeaaaaaaaaahhhhh!!!!! (Cue kick-ass knee-slide across the stage.)

OK, it’s that goofy hopeful Opening Day feeling. 162 games. My baby will be one year old when it ends…that is, if they make the playoffs. Long ways to go. Easy. Calm.

By the way, I watched the Blackhawks win in OT at Cody’s yesterday and ever since I got the cable TV I’ve been all over hockey. Cody’s, incidentally, was the site of the Bears Superbowl debacle of a couple years ago, where we watched Hester run back the opening kickoff and Rex Grossman crumble under the pressure. Now with the Cutler in place it feels like the Bears are just a couple of receivers, a fullback, an offensive line, a sack man and a cornerback away from going back to the big game.

Speaking of Cutler, the discussions at the bar yesterday led to the unscientific unanimous observation that he’s kind of a dopey-looking guy. The Blago-meets-Damien Omen II-haircut has got to go.*

* Credit to Jim in D-Town for that one.


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