Danny Doom’s Booze Cabinet

When I woke up Sunday morn and happened upon local Fox News’ airing of the Fox News Sunday program (tv was left on that channel from the Bears game the night before?) I saw a portion of the interview with Glenn Beck. Poor Mike Wallace’s son Chris was interviewing him, and I say “poor Mike Wallace” because look at what he hath spawned…but anyway, Mike’s son asked questions and Beck gave answers that spun around into little balls of nonsensical twine and then shot out again, like when he asked him whether he was losing his eyesight:

Beck goes into some long, incomprehensible word goulash recitation where he says, he realized “I’m not seeing something because I have eyes.” Essentially, at some point a doctor told him he might at some point go blind, and he laughed and said, “My mom told me that when I ran with a stick.”

Um, no, Glenn. Your mom said that if you masturbated too much you would go blind. Get it right. But really, the only thing that really struck me from the “interview” was when Beck said he was one of those guys who boozed it up heavy way back when and then at some point he stopped and replaced that addicts’ thirst the way that so many do, with some kind of extreme religious conversion. Just like our favorite ex-president, perhaps?

It used to be “never trust anyone over 30,” until that stopped being useful, so now my new motto is “never trust an ex-boozehound who filled that void with excessive Jesus.” Seriously!

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I can’t say that I watch this show, or any cable news show, with any regularity or really at all, but I’ve certainly seen it. And Rachel Maddow appears to be the most sensible person there is on any of the three mostly terrible networks. This segment, most importantly, kicks ass, and I highly recommend it. If only to put the myth of the Fox News ratings juggernaut into perspective.

UPDATE:

President Obama may want to watch this. Over-reacting to such a small, lunatic segment of America’s right-wing is not going to accomplish much of anything. It really is easy to ignore these folks, I do it all the time. By the way, when I say “President Obama,” what I really mean is “the White House.” I truly don’t believe that Obama himself cares so much about these things but it is obvious that there is a staff mentality that is keeping close watch on these dummies. Why, I have no idea.

Bill Maher does it again. It’s true, what he says. The pope has never threatened my ass for all the shit I give him. All of those silly religions I have ridiculed–”cults” if you will–I haven’t heard a peep from them. Maybe I need a bigger forum? Have they heard what I’ve said? Well, whatever, I approve of Maher’s message.

I don’t know who this dimwit Ken Blackwell is (the other black Republican?), but he is clearly not used to making coherent points. In this case, it happens to be about a book he allegedly wrote (“there are twenty-one points that ‘we’ make”). Ohhh, I don’t want to know what kind of dummy is going to buy this fluff–his book is titled “Blueprint: Obama’s Plan to Subvert the Constitution and Build an Imperial Presidency”–but I have a pretty good idea.

As always, Stewart is way too respectful of Blackwell; he should be ripped to shreds for this trash, but he gets fairly spanked anyway. Goddamn, these guys…I’m always amazed at the stupidity! But then, perhaps I am confusing stupidity with “marketing.”

Here’s another take on it at The Huffington Post. They thought Stewart tore him to shreds. Okay. He certainly handled it well, I just wanted to see blood at some point.

Part II and Part III:

I am the Tea Party people! Yes, former SNL’er Victoria Jackson isn’t crazy. She’s just been taught well by Glenn Beck. Wow.

I saw this last night and had a hard time not wanting to punch the face of Marc Thiessen through the screen. Eminently punchable. If you watch this it goes on for three parts–after the allotted time is up Thiessen whines about not getting to talk. If I were The Daily Show I would do a count and show the minutes each spoke. This guy’s such a baby. The problem? Your point is garbage!

Sullivan: “Thiessen’s arguments were both morally repugnant, legally absurd, McCarthyite and ignorant.” Yep, they were that too.

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I highly recommend this video as an insight to what happens when the spin is gone and lies can be challenged and answered without any shouting heads. This is how it should be. Fantastic. They should do it once a month, or once a week. This is the guy I voted for, able to speak and go back and forth and, yes, school those who are distorting his words and actions.

Wow, is Leno in on the joke or is Kimmel just blasting him right there on his own show? Either way, I love it. Screw Leno. I can’t believe he’s going to get away with this.

I’m loading up here, it’s a big post Friday. Now this one really blows my mind. Not that Giuliani said it, but that the interviewer let him say it without any response. No follow-up. No incredulous “Ummm, what?!?” No “hold on a minute, you are clearly wrong.” Giuliani’s not the first right-winger to make this claim, that there were no attacks under Bush, but how can someone sit there and allow it? Especially when it’s Giuliani, the man who was actually there on 9/11!

And the interviewer in this case? George Stephanopoulos. Man, you gotta be kidding me! Guy leaves the Sunday talk show gig for Good Morning, America and leaves his soul behind. And his balls.

UPDATE:

Stephanopoulos bravely took to his blog to declare Giuliani wrong after the interview. That’s journalism! I’m sure that George’s blog has at least one-tenth the audience that GMA has. Whatta useless dick.

UPDATE II:

Now this is what I like to see–action! George heard me and has responded:

All of you who have pointed out that I should have pressed him on that misstatement in the moment are right.  My mistake, my responsibility.

I don’t watch Conan with any regularity, or Fallon, or even Letterman, but man, that sounds like a raw deal. Leno comes back and everyone’s gotta move around to accommodate him? Man, that’s just wrong. Jay, just end it! It’s over!

NOTE: The title of the post needs to be said out loud in your best Jay Leno imitation.

“The extent to which he can recover seems to me depends on his faith,” Hume said. “He is said to be a Buddhist. I don’t think that faith offers the kind of forgiveness and redemption that is offered by the Christian faith. My message to Tiger would be, ‘Tiger, turn to the Christian faith and you can make a total recovery and be a great example to the world.”

What a glorious start to the new year! Brit Hume of Fox News, offering his unique brand of unsolicited dickish ignorance and advice. I offer wonder whether these folks are for real but this guy, with his grim humorless monotone–he’s a true believer. A true, dickish, arrogant believer. Happy New Year, everybody!

I’m not a regular watcher of MSNBC, or any other news network, but apparently it is the “liberal” channel to Fox’s right-wingin’ garbage. I don’t necessarily believe that since they have a Morning Joe guy who was a former Republican politician (never seen it) and Chris Matthews is not what I would call a partisan left-wing guy, from what I’ve seen. There’s Olbermann, who is definitely a partisan guy, and I enjoy his take-downs of Rush and Hannity and O’Reilly when I see them. And then there’s Rachel Maddow, who is what I would consider probably the fairest of them all, even while maintaining a progressive approach. I suppose that’s why she has been showing up on “Meet the Press” of late.

But whatever. I find it weird that people are loyal to a network, like they seem to be with Fox. I don’t have much interest in watching, or listening to, constant reaffirmations of what I believe. I call that “insecurity.”

But it’s nice to know that MSNBC is not simply cheering on Obama now that he is president. Imagine the credibility of the “tea-baggers” if they had not suddenly developed a sense of fiscal responsibility only after Bush had left office. They might actually have some. Imagine if the right (Fox) had done some criticizing of Bush while he spent all the money on stupid wars instead of waiting until Obama was elected. Well, it didn’t happen.

“I don’t think our audience is looking for unequivocal ‘rah-rah,’ ” said Ms. Maddow, who calls herself a liberal but not a Democrat.

That’s what I call myself as well. I have yet to see a reason for loyalty to the Democratic Party, especially with the way they have let their collective balls go up into their scrotums this year. Not to mention the Blue Dogs, and Lieberman, oh, don’t get me started. Anyway, cheers to that “liberal network” for doing what they can to keep Obama honest.

Now, who is Lou Dobbs and why should I care?

Brilliant!

Ah, and here it is! I had forgotten about the site onegoodmove, which I used to visit quite regularly. It has been a while, and so as I now see, it is my loss. You can see great clips like this one, or Al Franken kicking ass, or any number of things. Larry David = Genius.